Clever Girl Writes...

For instance, I could use it as an excuse to get out of, well, pretty much anything. Especially work, exercise, and sex...

DUI

You can only really love something that shitty when you’re high, by the way...

Look, there's no denying there were a lot of poor mountain folk in the Ozarks sewing quilts who never left their small towns and married people who may or may not...

I would never commit to something so stupid like that, so why are you still standing there with that look on your face? 

Now, I’ve never been bombed before because I’m Caucasian, but I would imagine this is what...

I slowly opened the door and saw a bunch of middle-aged women in  workout clothes dancing around in what I can only describe as...

But some mistakes do make you a dumb-ass; it's a universal law, and just how much of a dumb-ass is determined on a sliding scale...

He assumed a woman would just accept him and his situation without demanding he try harder. He’s a man, he doesn’t have to try harder...

Don’t people understand that at my age the only thing I have going for me is carbs? I dream about carbs...

It supposedly builds character when someone has overtaken you physically and mentally, making you feel like a powerless piece of shit...