Clever Girl Writes...

And if you’re jealous or threatened by someone else’s accomplishments, keep it to yourself, why act out on it? Stop underestimating people...

...why we're absolutely swallowed up in phallic symbolism everywhere we turn!

Feeling… kinda restless, tight jaw. I forgot I grind my teeth at night when I’m on coffee. Bags under my eyes...

Your kids will come looking for you when the terror of abandonment sets in after they haven’t seen you for two hours...

Next time you meet an introvert, don’t assume we don’t like you...

I am a feminist… chubby, even. But that doesn’t supersede reality based observations. I don’t know about your courthouses, but the ones here in California employ overweight ladies

Men my age look like shit. I don’t know if it’s because they’ve had it so fucking good for so long they don’t have to try...

I stood there with a shit-eating grin on my face because I managed to pull something out of my ass after blowing it with the sauce...

So there I was, sitting in my car in the parking lot, shoving these goddamn Unicorn Oreos into my face...

When your vision board is completed, you get really excited because for a brief moment you actually believe your life will change by gluing pictures onto a board...