Clever Girl Writes...

I got pissed off that I fell for it, and I promised myself I’d never fall for it again...

Why am I selling such a blessing, such a hot hunk of metal, you ask? I couldn’t take care of her the way she wanted, the way she needed...

Like, how about not taking more than you need, for instance? I mean, how many napkins do you need when you’re eating your tacos?

You ever yell “Learn how to drive!” at shitty drivers? I’ve done it, it’s a waste of time. People aren’t gonna take the initiative to learn how to become better drivers…

I need to maybe stick with the plain or ugly dudes. They're more willing to please than the hot guys...

Let me preface this by saying there are two characteristics of people I detest. Okay, there are lots of characteristics of people I detest, but the two that stand out the...

Couldn’t they come up with a more appealing term, like flower inspection? I don’t even know what a pap is.

I know you want everything to be hunky dory while you enjoy your stroll with your family… yay! Well fuck that shit...

I have the type of body that was more appreciated during times like the Renaissance or Cretaceous period...

...why we're absolutely swallowed up in phallic symbolism everywhere we turn!